The day I became a man

I’m still processing my Advance experience. It was powerful…

Last weekend 35 men came together, to come closer to God. Even someone like me, who is hungry for depth … I bit in so deep, that I am still chewing!

One of the questions asked in a group setting was, when did you became a man? Excellent question followed by an even better discussion. So much so, that I decided to write it out. Not to give a conclusive answer, but to encourage further reflection.

In my opinion, what makes me a man is my decision to rely on God, rather than myself. For much of my life I relied on myself, because that’s who’s always been around. In other words, my parents passed away, my ex wife moved out and my supervisor evaluated me based on my individual performance. I felt forced to take care of myself, because otherwise who would?

I learned the hard way, that relying on self alone works … until it blows up in your face. When I thought I was relying on myself, I was actually conforming to what other people expected of me. People’s expectations change and it’s only a matter of time before I become redundant.

When I turned my focus to relying on God, I focused on what is eternal. World changes all the time. These days even faster than ever. Instead of backwards engineering myself to other people’s expectations, I decided to continually chip away at the habits that take me away from God. To see less as the current trends of today see it and more as God sees it. 

The very choice I thought would make me even more alone, turned out anything but. God oriented people started showing up in my life… Quality friends and awesome wife. 

I can finally say that I found meaning in life and actually mean it. 

When did it happen? I’d say the day I quit Exxon. Something I would say, just a few year earlier, only an idiot would do…

But because I opened my heart to God … my mind told me that I’d be an idiot not to do it. 

That’s the moment I became a man. At age of 37.

What is you criteria for becoming a man? When did it happen?


Don’t know how to get started? We tend to be very good at solving problems with our minds. However, when our romantic relationships suffer, we don’t feel fulfilled at work, or don’t have quality friends … it typically has very little to do with logic. It’s driven by a locked up heart.

Please e-mail for a complementary 30 minute “break the cycle” consultation.

After our talk, you will understand how leveraging love as a skill will unbind your heart and get you the breakthrough results you’re looking for.

Please provide the following information to get future posts mailed directly to your inbox

* indicates required

Posted in Blog.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *